Even if they might not admit it, everyone has their own personal list of traits and skills that an ideal life partner must possess. Right off the bat, people can tell what qualities they would like a long-term partner to have, and these can include things like intelligence, kindness, financial stability, a love for cooking, and maybe a good bone structure to boot. People who are actively looking for a partner through the internet or a professional matchmaking service in Malaysia often go in with a comprehensive list of such qualities that will serve as a basis for determining who could be the right fit for their world.
Although people have varying preferences for an ideal mate, some non-negotiable qualities are vital for any romantic relationship to blossom. Beyond having a tall frame and a preference for the same ice cream flavour, there are certain green flags that you would do well to spot from the very first date. Whether you’re steadily dating someone or trying to decide if a fling is the real deal, here are some of the qualities that your potential partner must possess.
Similarity
A long-term relationship often leads to marriage down the line. That said, you would need to have a partner whose beliefs and outlook in life align with yours. It’s not possible for anyone to tick all the boxes when it comes to similarity, and sometimes it’s the people whose interests vastly differ from yours who make life more interesting. However, people who have the same opinions on matters such as marriage, family-building, and careers are more attuned to building a life together without having to argue or compromise deeply held values. So while a “soulmate” who likes all the same things probably does not exist, you can find someone compatible who views life from a similar lens as you.
Individuality and a Sense of Boundaries
Even though relationships are built on the connectedness and similarity of the couple, it’s also important for each party to retain a sense of self. If you’re drawn to someone and want to keep getting to know them, you’ll have no qualms when they take up a huge chunk of your day. Despite this, an ideal partner must be respectful of boundaries and know when they are being too controlling or insensitive.
The right person must be empathic and sensitive to your needs, feelings, and desires, even when you think you’re overreacting. Moreover, they must treat you as an equal—an individual with your own dreams and interests that are separate from your partner. Couples in healthy relationships are supportive of each other’s goals and work together to build the path towards these objectives.
Openness and Honesty
One doesn’t have to be a relationship expert to know that open communication and understanding are the keys to any successful relationship. In essence, your partner must be able to communicate their thoughts and listen to you when you’re communicating yours. Even research backs the importance of open communication: according to a 2016 study published in the Journal of Marriage and Family, couples that communicate with each other more often tend to have more satisfying marriages.
Poor communication will likely just lead to confusion and a lack of trust, which will cause further problems down the line. No relationship is perfect, but couples that are able to communicate verbally and nonverbally can establish compromises to make things work. Healthy relationships require intimacy, and in order to be intimate, one must be willing to be open—even if it means being vulnerable.
Maturity
When searching for the right partner, you should not discount the importance of maturity. Remember, you’re looking for a life partner, not a child to take care of. Your partner must be able to handle less-than-ideal situations constructively rather than destructively. Being able to do so shows that they are willing to address their shortcomings and potentially toxic behaviors in order to grow and become a better partner.
A mature partner also believes that relationships take work. They know when to let their ego take a backseat and are self-aware enough to determine which aspects of the relationship you both need to grow through.
Sense of Humour
It’s a long-held belief that funny people are more attractive. But on a deeper level, having a sense of humour plays a huge role in building strong relationships. Partners that have the ability to find humour in the face of absurdity make each day feel lighter and reinforce the belief that life should not be taken too seriously. Laughing at yourself makes life more bearable, and it’s much more worth it when you have someone laughing along with you.
When It Comes to Green Flags, Trust Your Gut
Although these qualities are some of the most common indicators of a good life partner, the list is not a definitive or exhaustive one. There are other telltale signs that the person you’re seeing should take permanent residency in your life, and these can include how they treat your friends and family or how they feel about pets.
While it’s easy to deduce signs of green flags in a person, the task of truly knowing them takes time. But whether you’re on the first date or the tenth one, your gut can always tell if it’s worth it to know more about someone in the end.